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May 02, 2005
All Pushing AsideI never really considered myself a pushy person by any means but I began thinking about a conversation I had with a friend of mine on a rainy Saturday night after work. Me: "I don't feel like I am pushing for a relationship. I feel like I am pursuing what I want, is that the same thing at all?" And really, I want to know where this idea about pursuing love instead of 'letting it find you' was deemed inappropriate? Who made it so? I know I certainly am done with trying to date someone for years at a time, I'm 20 and as I see it if I want to have a relationship with someone I should be able to WITHOUT having to wait around until God, Fate or whothefuckever decides it's my time. I'm sick of that predestined/predetermined bullshit! Honestly, we live in a very callous and realistic world and if we do then how in the hell has this idea of letting love find you maintained its existence? Ridiculous. Now, look I am not saying that I am not about taking my time but when I say it's time it should be time God damn it! I'm in control of my own life and I refuse to let anyone tell me otherwise...especially my mother. She said to me that it may be ten years before I find the person I am supposed to spend my life with, well that's real fucking dandy...I'll be thirty before I find the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with? Well, that's just fabulous! Hey, let's not allow ample time, if that were the truth I'd be cramming everything in my life with my significant other just to be able to retire in time and not have children that are two years old when I'm forty-five. Absurd! (Not that I am having children but you can see how someone in my shoes who may want children would be perturbed...) Now really...let's get a more realistic, centralized view about this relationship bullshit. And honestly, I am not all about having a boyfriend necessarily, but it's nice to be able to hang out with someone and not worry about where you're gonna be getting sex from the next time or how to tell a guy who hits on you you're not interested...having anyone(!) is complimentary of the fact that I want to be done with dating. *Always. |
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Sometimes those most worthy of love are not made happy by it. ~Dangeous Liaisons It is on the strength of observation that one finds a way; so we must dig and delve unceasingly. ~Claude Monet 1840-1926 |