I will not be beaten by a bad man this time or any other time for that matter. I am hoping that what I gain this time around will be the real truth - that no one can validate me, especially not a guy that experiences vast periods of indifference and disapproval. I can no longer pretend to be "OK" with being ignored/slightly overlooked. No person deserves that; not even the worst sort of person...
I believe that having experienced these feelings has drastically taken away from the goodness of my character: I was all the time feeling sad and confused about what I was doing wrong or what I wasn't doing right rather.
I have also made a firm decision to look into a few of the Catholic Churchs down here; I went to St. Charles' today and it was very very warming - at least, I know where I will be doing my studying for the rest of the year: that place is so unbelievably quiet. I went into the parish today and took a look around...I miss the big cathedrals - I love my church at home but I had always thought that Churchs should be a grand affair, so St. Charles' is nice in this way!
Currently, I still have no plans for a major/career. I find daily that my resolve for really deciding to choose one this year seems to be fading. It's so hard...
And last but not least my step father has yet again traveled to Florida to work storm duty there which leaves my mother at home with only her thought to keep her company...I think I should go home next weekend and keep her company but then if I did go home next weekend I would only be working. Sad day indeed.
Well, goodnight to you all. Please come again later...there's freshness every day...well, almost anyway.
*Always.
Caitlin
Sometimes those most worthy of love are not made happy by it. ~Dangeous Liaisons
It is on the strength of observation that one finds a way; so we must dig and delve unceasingly. ~Claude Monet 1840-1926